THE MASTER PIECE

Rocky: It's comin' up on that time again! Okay, Ginger! Fire it up!

Ginger: My pleasure Rocky! (puts gloves on both hands and goggles and gets a key underneath his shoe then puts it on the grill and turns it on like a car) I love this part of the job.

Taylor: Don't forget the cheese!

Ginger: This part ain't bad either! (puts out a cheese slice and opens his face and puts the cheese in and blows them sliced into the plate, positioned like a stack of cards)

Rocky: Looks good Ginger. Can you do the honors?

Ginger: (gasps) Don't you mean?

Rocky: Oh, we mean!

Ginger: (He kneels in front of Rocky and Taylor and worships him) Oh, thank you Rocky! Thank you! Disposed honor, have a privilege that I shall...

Taylor: What are you goin' about? I let ya turn the sign every day. (cuts inside in front of the door and Ginger arrives in front of the open sign with a suitcase and opens it which reveals ceremonial gloves and puts them on and independence music plays)

Ginger: As I put on the ceremonial gloves, I can put the eternal cycle and now redeem the Hut 17, open! (turns the sign to open and opens the doors) Patrons, spring forth! The Hut 17 will now seat you. (However, no one comes)

Taylor: (storms to Ginger) Alright, landlubbers! get the net... (gasps) Neptune's Trousers! Where are me costumers?! Just when the Krabby Patty was just about to go triple platinum', Mr. Tweedy! Where's... TWEEDY!

Rocky: (takes a peak at the register) No need to shout Taylor, he's right here. Safely watching his favorite show, As the World Turns.

Mr. Tweedy: (puts his hand in front of Rocky) Shut it Rocky, he is about to reveal his secret. (turns to an old Human)

Human: You understand', them Guppies. them's my children.

Mr. Tweedy: I knew it!

Rocky: In case you three haven't notice, WE HAVE NO COSTUMERS! Now we're not getting em' back if you three ladies sit around and watch the TV all day.

Sea Chicken: Cock-a-doodle-yum! ka pook aw! Rise and shine! For the best restaurant in the sea! (Rocky sits on Mr. Tweedy)

Rocky: Who dares lay claim to the title, best restaurant in the sea?!

Sea Chicken: The Sea Chicken Shack!

Interview Guy V/O: Say, Mr. Sea Chicken, how's that taste of that zesty Sea Chicken sandwich?

Sea Chicken: It's im-peck-able! Ka pook aw! So come on down to my Sea Chicken Shack. And don't forget the kids! (Some kids go and climb him)

Rocky: Blimey, this is the first I heard about this Mr. Sea Chicken. There goes my monopoly! But how did the restaurant gets all my customers? Ginger?! I need you to go down to the sea chicken shack and investigate,

Ginger: Do you need me to go undercover?

Rocky: Uhh that won't be necessary. So just look around in there if anything is suspicious.

Ginger: Understood, Mr. R. (Takes picture of Rocky) How do you like my new arm pit spy cam? Huh huh huh?

Rocky: Ginger, I don't need a spy.

SpongeBob: Oh oh oh! What about my new spy pen, just an ordinary pen, see, see, see.

Rocky: I see.

Ginger: Well, you be mistaken sir. Because this pen is also... A pencil. Pretty sweet with undercover spy stuff, eh?

Rocky: Ginger, stop acting like that!

Ginger: You're right sir. who needs a spy pen when you are a master of the undercover arts? I'll blend in with the common men. Then, like a whisper, i am gone.

(Scene changes to inside of the Sea Chicken Shack)

Ginger: Orange Hen to Big Human: do you read me?

Taylor: Just tell me what you see, Ginger.

Ginger: I am inside, repeat, I am inside. nothing to be so far, in fact, it's kind of dumpy. (looks down to a cheap looking chair) And customer safety.. A little lax. And it smells in here like a tuna bathed in algae after running a marathon.

Ducky: (shows Ducky wearing a marathon number and sweating heavily) Oh, so it's a crime now to exercise?

Taylor: What about the food?

Ginger: I have infiltrated the line in order to remain sample.

Cashier: Next!

Ginger: Oh! uh.. One of your finest sandwiches please.

Cashier: I'm afraid I can't do that, ma'am. Please refer to our policy regarding dress.

Ginger: Headbands equal no service. Barnacles! A disguises' only weakness.

(Grabs Ginger)

Ginger: Mayday, mayday, Big human, Contact has not been established. Mission abort, mission abort! (Throws Ginger out the door) Orange hen to Big Human, I was not to offord to obtain any intel!

Taylor: Cut the spy lingo and just tell me! Is there anything remarkable about the Sea Chicken Shack?

Ginger: Other than the faux dilapidation, not really.

Taylor: What you're describing is an absolute dump. Are there any unique and interesting plans that might attract some costumers in anyway?

Ginger: No. GREAT BARREL OF BLOCKS!!!

Taylor: What is it? Tell me what you see!

Ginger: I see, a huge statue of Mr. Sea Chicken and all his glory!

Taylor: A statue? How does a statue steal all o' my customers? Ginger? Ginger! [Ginger is playing with a Sea Chicken Statue with the kids] Of course. Mr Sea Chicken. You mad trickster, you. Cater to the kids, and the parents will follow.

(Scene changes to Hut 17)

Taylor: Guys, we don't have much time, but I'm gonna make this short and sweet. I need an artist... Someone with a vision... Something along with a big talent... Someone will create this glorious statue of my likeness.

Bunty: He's talking about me.

Taylor: Do you know anyone who has an artistic bone in their body?

Ginger/Rocky: Oo oo oo! We do.

Taylor: Um... Wallace and Gromit?

Ginger/Rocky: No.

Taylor: Fowler?

Ginger/Rocky: No!

Taylor: The late William Hickey?

Ginger/Rocky: No.

Taylor: My mom?

Bunty: For the love of all things briny... IT'S ME!

Ginger/Rocky: Correct.

Taylor: Oh, that's right, Bunty! You do... Dabble in the... Doodily doody doo.

Bunty: For those who care, I am nothing short of an artistic genius.

Rocky: Word.

Bunty: Unfortunately, I won't be doing it in any of your commercial pieces. Goodbye.

Taylor: Wait Bunty, hold on a second! You and I are gonna be different, huh? We both make product.

Bunty: Are you suggesting that the krabby patties are art?

Taylor: Yes. Bunty, do you have any ideas people came to Hut 17 everyday?

Bunty: I dunno. 12?

Taylor: Well, that's 12 more seeing your art than yesterday.

Bunty: OK, Taylor, I'll do it. But I will promise to make it softer.

Taylor: You got it, long as I need it by tomorrow.

Bunty: Yes tomo- Tomorrow?!

Taylor: As advertised.

Bunty: I can't work up to the ages overnight! Art shouldn't march to a ticking clock, art should come when art is good and ready, sir!

Taylor: If you want the public to experience your cultural input, get it ready by 8:00 am.

Bunty: I'll need assistants.

Taylor: Here you go.

(Gives Bunty; Rocky and Ginger)

Bunty: Fine. The first thing you wanna do, assistants, is get me a giant rock so I may sculpt this master piece.

Ginger/Rocky: Anything for the artiste!

Bunty: And don't dilly... Dally. nice rock.

Ginger: Isn't it?

Rocky: I didn't believe no one was using it.

(Scene shows Ginger and Rocky took the rock from a piece of a museum. Museum then collapses)

Bunty: Ok, prepare to be immortalized in stone.

Taylor: Hey hey hey! What do you think you're doing? I'm... Shy.

Bunty: I am posing you! Do you want the customers make the sculpture? Don't you want the money the statue is gonna bring in?

Taylor: Like this?

Bunty: No.

Taylor: This.

Bunty: No.

Taylor: This.

Bunty: No.

Taylor: This.

Bunty: No.

Taylor: Aw, c'mon, Bunty! (sniffs arm pits)

Bunty: Hold that pose! Don't move a muscle! [Laughs]

Taylor: How long do I have to stay like this?

Bunty: Just as long as it takes.

(Bunty claps, when his tool break; Rocky and Ginger brings him a new sculptor)

Taylor: C'mon Bunty, hurry up! I'm about to give out!

Bunty: All done!

Taylor: All right! Let's see!

Bunty: You might want to put on sun glasses because you will be blinded by my genius.

Taylor: Yeah, yeah. Just show me! [Drumroll]

Bunty: Voila!

(Fanfare plays and slows down as Taylor looks, frowns, then faints. Befuddled Gent by Philip Green is playing)

Taylor: What's that supposed to be?

Bunty: This is a master piece.

Taylor: I don't have a mouth in my stomach!

Bunty: This represents the gaping, mashing maw of consumerism in the endless cavern it creates within us all. I call it oppression.

Taylor: Whatever that means. But is it safe for kids to play on?

Bunty: This is art! Not a swing set!

Taylor: Well, we should take a test before we let the general republic use it. Ginger! Rocky!

Rocky/Ginger: Yes sir?!

Taylor: I need you to go and frolic and play on this here... Doohickey thing.

Bunty: It is not a doohickey, IT'S ART!

Rocky: We read ya loud and clear buddy.

Ginger: Loud and clear.

(Harry the Hippo by Philip Green plays as Rocky and Ginger begins swinging on the statues arm until it falls over on him)

Ginger: Well, that was unexpected.

Taylor: BUNTY!!! I can't let children play on that... that... weapon! I'll get my job fired!

Bunty: What? You wanted a piece of art and that is what you got?

Taylor: Oh it's a piece alright, a piece of junk!

Rocky: Taylor, if we may be allowed floating an idea.

Taylor: Did you hear something?

(Taylor is now painted gold and baby chickens are playing on him)

Taylor: Oh. Ooh, how long do I have to stay like this?

Bunty: As long as you want to sell this many patties.

Taylor: Ooh...

Ginger: I think you look very good, sir.

Rocky: Yeah, you're golden! [Rocky and Ginger laughs]